Online dating grows up
Sites add personality, compatibility tests to woo women
Many sites that began by focusing on the more masculine, visual
aspects of electronic courtship are attempting to go deeper to attract
more women and balance the gender mix, dating experts say. More sites
are adding features like personality and compatibility tests, relationship
advice and enhanced customer service to meet demand from women in
particular.
Men were the ones who built the dating sites and provided the venture
capital to run them, but companies increasingly are trying to appeal
to the feminine side of the equation, says James Currier, founder
and chief executive of Tickle Inc., formerly Emode.com.
"The sites that focus on transactions, looking at pictures,
attract more men," Currier says. "The people who are looking
at long-term relationships and looking at really connecting with people
tend to be female. The services themselves were designed for men with
men in mind. It's got to be balanced."
While most sites remain male-dominated, Tickle has achieved an even
gender split by allowing people to take as many of 60 specialized
tests as they see fit -- whether they want to measure themselves or
search for a partner based on intelligence, values or sexual compatibility,
he says.
Eharmony, another dating site, has managed to tip the scale 60-40
in favor of females, says founder Neil Clark Warren, a psychologist
for 37 years. Match.com, on the other hand, has 40 percent women and
offers audio and video elements along with MatchMobile, which promotes
text message exchanges.
Shaking their money makers
One in 10 wired consumers use e-personals, and most are men -- 28
percent of them married, according to Forrester Research. There are
about 40 million visits to online dating sites each month.
Whatever their motives, singles and not-so-singles are paying record
dollars to try online dating. Consumers spent $214 million on online
personals in the first half of 2003, up 76 percent from $121 million
last year, according to Comscore Media Metrix. Internet dating became
the largest source of paid content sales in 2002,overtaking the business/investment
and entertainment/lifestyles categories.
"You're seeing more people visiting sites than subscribing to
them. There's increased competition, but also increased demand,"
Comscore analyst Graham Mudd says.
Companies such as Match.com, Yahoo Personals and American Singles
-- as well as those catering to niche markets such as religious, obese
and gay groups -- appeal to singles' entrepreneurial spirit, whether
they're looking for lasting or casual rendezvous, says Barbara Dafoe
Whitehead, author of "Why There Are No Good Men Left."
"People are willing to spend money for this because it does
meet a very real need," Whitehead says. "The traditional
mating system where people met someone in their neighborhood or college
is pretty much dead. What we have is a huge population of working
singles who have limited opportunities to go through some elaborate
courtship."
Finding the right site
Many newcomers tend to start with Match.com, one of the oldest and
largest sites, because it allows people to freely search the database
without going through the steps and personality testing that sites
like Eharmony require, Whitehead says.
A common approach is to sign up for free trial memberships at several
sites and see which suit you best before putting any money down, says
Pepper Schwartz, a sociology professor at the University of Washington
and romance expert for PerfectMatch.com. InterActiveCorp. (IACI: news,
chart, profile) operates Match.com and Udate.
Most online dating sites let you browse profiles for free, but charge
you to make contact with an individual. Buying a membership provides
you a variety of services.
Both Match.com and Tickle charge $19.95 for one month or $39.95 for
three months. Eharmony charges $49.95 for one month, $99.95 for three
or $249.95 for a year.
Social networking sites such as Tribe.net and Friendster, which offer
online matchmaking as well as community groups, appeal to those wary
of a "dating" site, Schwartz says. "It's kind of a
way to slip in sideways."
Schwartz designed the personality test featured on PerfectMatch,
which debuted in September. Last week the site began allowing people
to search potential dates by their "Pepper personality types."
For the serious-minded, the test plays a crucial role in conserving
energy, she says. "We'll get increasingly sophisticated about
these things because everyone's time and emotions are very valuable."
Where the women are
At Eharmony, Warren attributes the high percentage of women to questions
designed to screen out unstable people and the lengthy personality
test users have to complete before joining. The 435-item test then
spits out compatible matches based on 29 factors such as energy level,
ambition and child-raising attitudes, and it's up to members chosen
as mutual matches to begin a four-stage communication process.
A lie scale built into the initial questionnaire flags questionable
candidates, and about 200,000 people have been turned away because
of their answers, Warren says.
"I want (members) to be real picky on the front end," says
Warren, who's been married to the same woman for 44 years. "The
choice you make with a marriage partner has more to do with the eventual
success of your marriage than everything combined that you do"
after making your selection.
He's expecting 350,000 new members this month and makes no apologies
for the premium price he charges nor the extended test and irreversibility
-- once a match rejects you, there's no more contact -- that comes
with the site's long-term focus.
At Tickle, the goal is to strike an even balance among dating desires
and let users choose their own course, deciding what to reveal and
when according to their own preferences, Currier says.
"Our real science is applied to long term relationships. The
technology tools like instant messaging, photos are applied to shorter-term
interests people have. Our philosophy is you have to provide them
with both."
