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Girlfriend resents chat-room friend
I've been with my girlfriend for a long time, and I think we're pretty serious. A couple of weeks ago I was in a chat room for something to do with work, and I struck up a conversation with a young lady who seems really fun and interesting. We've exchanged e-mail addresses and phone numbers and talk pretty regularly.
My girlfriend is really upset by this, but it's no big deal. It's not as if I'm interested in this other woman romantically or anything. My girlfriend wants me to stop talking to the other woman, but I don't feel I should have to. How do I get her to understand she shouldn't think I'm cheating on her?
I think the fact that she is uncomfortable with your relationship with another woman should be enough to make you want to break off the extraneous friendship. I'm not saying that your girlfriend should dictate all your friendships, but if you truly are serious about her, her happiness should be more important to you than a friendship with a woman you've never even met.
That being said, if she's making other unreasonable demands on you that seem to be isolating and manipulative, forget everything I wrote before. Abuse sometimes begins in a relationship when one partner begins to dictate the other partner's friendships, and isolation is a key tactic. I really don't know enough about your relationship to say whether that is the case.
My parents are constantly comparing my younger brother and me, and I am so sick of it. I always come out on top because I have a college degree and my brother doesn't, and I am engaged and my brother hasn't ever even dated anyone seriously. What makes it even worse is my brother is starting to resent me for how great my life is. I don't want this to come between us.
Since when do college degrees and someone to spend major holidays with constitute success in life? It's admirable that you are sick of the comparisons even though you come out on top. I think you need to tell your parents how it's making you feel - and how you imagine it's making your brother feel. They may believe they are doing your brother a favor by constantly pointing out his shortcomings in comparison to you - giving him a verbal kick in the pants, if you will.
However, I don't think they're doing anybody any favors. Comparisons are never good, and are often toxic between siblings who begin to resent each other. Tell your parents to cut it out. Then talk to your brother about how you think their behavior is out of line and unfair. It will probably help him to know that you're on his side - not theirs.
Full credit for story goes to: Henderson Gleaner, KY